Sisypus

Well, you know that moon watcher thing I put down there? I did it more for my own benefit; so I would have a heads up as my lunartic time was approaching. I thought I had evaded her this month. I was just saying to Papi the other night that hey, I snuck under the lunar radar this month. Well. No such luck. Last night it hit like a two ton boulder dropping blap right in my path again. Unlike Sisyphus I never get the damn thing to move an inch so I don't even get the satisfaction of making it to the top and the pleasurable agony of being mowed down by it. Nah. It just sits there and shove as I might I can't get the fucker to budge. And the fucker is my mood. It gets dark and despondent and nihilistic and downright nasty. Not good nasty. Bad nasty. Like soggy grey rainy nasty. Like no sunshine for months nasty. Like your car won't start and your bank account is hurting and you stubbed your toe and it's bleeding nasty. Like why bother trying any more and why am I alone and where is my tribe nasty. Like the mortgage broker got pregnant even though you started inseminating before she did and your dream house is turning out to be a nightmare and you're turning 40 and you still don't know what you want to do with your life nasty. Did I say soggy grey rainy nasty? And, like the rain, I know it will blow over. But, for now, I'm just sitting here staring at this mother fucking rock.